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Makayla-Matthew C. Perry High School-Matthew C. Perry High School

Makayla Johnson

Matthew C. Perry High School

I Can’t Handle Change

I sit on my bed, holding my breath, as a million thoughts swirl through my mind like a whirlpool. There’s so many, and they’re all going so fast. I can barely focus on the loudest thought, despite it basically screaming at me. Screaming in my face. I still can’t hear it. Even then, I know what it is. Coming to terms with it was the problem. This was always the problem. My hands engulf my face as I try to think harder. As I try to find any sense in what my brain trying to say. Then it’s clear. My head becomes silent and a single thought rings through, surrounding my entire being.

“Things are changing again. “

And I can feel my heart rip violent beats through my chest, once I finally face the truth. I had just got comfortable, and here we are. Things are changing again. I wasn’t ready. I was never ready. I don’t want to leave. I’m not ready to leave. I don’t want to leave my family. I don’t want to leave my home. I’m so scared.

Then my mom walks in. I see her, and I see her smile. Everything settles. The walls of heavy tension do not crumble, but they fall. They fall down and let her in. My life’s comfort. Things are changing again, but family stays the same, right?

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